Thriving Under Pressure – Shift 5
SHIFT 5: Choosing a disciplined lifestyle with habits and rituals that imbed the other four shifts, allowing us to continue growing and to own our day, every day.
In your quest for happiness, have you debated whether to employ discipline to do hard things, or to live as if it is your last day, and just enjoy the moment? I often have and still do from time to time. I even still try both approaches to reconfirm my conclusion. The answer always turns out the same for me: I am happier when I choose a disciplined lifestyle.
So why does waking up earlier than otherwise, doing something that my body or mind doesn’t naturally want to do, and using precious time from my day always turn out to be the right answer for me? There are really three main reasons for this.
The first reason is that the other four shifts we discussed – as critical as they are, and as much as they ultimately align us with our higher nature – are quite hard to do. Having discipline allows you to build those difficult but game changing four shifts. Take, for example, the habit of being in a clear and present mind, without being caught in rumination about problems we need to solve or some future state we desire. Getting this shift right can significantly improve your sleep and lead to higher levels of day-to-day joy in the present moment. However, some level of practice of mindfulness will be important in this shift. The mind wanders on its own. There are many thousands of years of bias that have led us to constantly be surveying for problems and trying to solve them. So to counteract this tendency, discipline is required. While the research on this varies, most studies point to between 20 and 60 days of regular daily practice (5 to 20 minutes) to shift the set point of the brain. Of course, we benefit from a single session of meditation. But to shift the ratio of the different types of waves in the brain and reach more centeredness consistently, you will need the discipline of a daily practice.
The second reason that a high discipline lifestyle is crucial is that daily habits allow for a platform for continuous growth and evolution. If you do not need the discipline to do one specific thing, then you can use that discipline to incorporate the next important thing on your personal growth journey. After something you are working on becomes a habit, it no longer draws on the discipline reserves that you have. You can move that change into the steady operating state of who you are. Now you have new capacity for the next thing you would like to make a regular part of your life. A choice for high discipline is a dedication to constant growth.
The third reason is that discipline allows for a morning ritual that is consistent and empowering. If you start your morning with the same routine every day, you can ensure that you can have the highest chance of showing up as the best version of yourself, despite of varying degrees of natural energy that you wake up with. As a leader, your people look to you constantly and take cues about their own safety and inspiration from you. Being short or grouchy with someone can break their trust and require significant energy to repair. But even more importantly, each day is precious in this human experience. Most of us have less than 3,000 weeks left. Starting every single day in connection with the things that matter most serves to keep us rooted in our core mission and benefits our happiness. My core morning routine consists of recalling things from the day before to feel the sensation of gratitude in my body. Then I move on to 25 minutes of meditation. I then read a one-page manifesto that reminds me of what is most important to me. I allow room for journaling to process key decisions or heavy emotional states. Finally, it includes the enjoyment of a great flavorful cup of coffee. Sometimes I extend this routine to include breathwork if I am particularly out of balance, a workout/yoga if my body can not wait until later in the day for movement, and drumming or dancing to one song to lighten the heart and set the energy of joy. Find what works for you. If you have kids, you may have to hold part of the routine until after they leave for school.
We will always engage in the debate of whether living for the moment and just having fun, or, living a high-discipline lifestyle, is the better route. A teacher once advised that we should live life with a bird on one shoulder reminding us that all we have is today, and a bird on the other shoulder reminding us that our life echoes in eternity. In my experience, if you are in a high power/high intensity/high stakes leadership position, and you still want to be happy and balanced, the clear answer is choosing the disciplined way. Try it for yourself, and as you do, take note that this does not mean you give up spontaneity or that you become a more rigid person – it just means you have some daily non-negotiables that help you unleash the best in yourself.
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